TERRY
As I sit down to write it is 8:15. Terry has NO paper today as the papers are not printed on this day. It may be the only day that is true. Terry is same same I would say. So it is another day as we venture down the road of life. We have nothing planned for the day.
May 28, 1962
As I lay in bed peeking out the west window of my bedroom it dawned on me this day was different. Brother Dave had graduated from high school last Friday and yesterday, Sunday he had loaded his car and left. I mean LEFT, not to live at home anymore. He had worked the past two summers for a farmer near Kulm North Dakota and would arrive at the same farm today. Through the summer of 1959 we had been the Lee brother of the farm. We had picked rock by the trailer load. We had dragged the fields before the grain came up. We had harvested grain down south on Uncle Jim's land. And we had harvested fields to the east and to the west of the farm. While waiting in the truck for Dad to need the hopper of the combine smoothed out we had almost solved all the problems of the world. AND on the land to the east of the farm we had enjoyed chokecherries from the trees on Bert's land. Then later when the harvest was finished we had gone out with the Ford and the M and plowed until all the land was tilled up with the rich soil being on top. During the school year we had shared the same bedroom and spent many many many nights lying awake talking about "what if" and of course girls always came into the conversation. BUT NOW ALL THAT WAS HISTORY AS DAVE WAS 18, OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL AND INTO THE WORLD ON HIS OWN. We had spent many many nights talking about what we wanted to do. We had spent many many nights talking about the positivities of girl friends etc. I will not get into what we said or what our view was of girls but I promise we were NOT into the reality of life as it played out. BUT now everything was different. Dave was out on his own and life would change in a big way.
As I pulled myself out of bed and got dressed I wondered, "What will the next three years be like without my Dave. It seemed like he was more realistic, more in tune with life and just way more adjusted to life than I. As I climbed the steps down stairs I felt I was walking into a new life with more unknowns than knowns. AND it turned out to be true.
It was Memorial Day and for the past many years Dave and I would play ball, ride our bikes up to the lake and just have a fun day. But as I sat down to Mom's pancakes with cream and syrup I felt that I would have to start over again. AND by myself.
For starters I decided to take the bike up to the lake to see if anybody was there so early in the day. As I walked out to get the bike I realized that I NOW had the big bike. In the past when Dave was home he had the big bike and I had the little bike but now I had graduated to the big bike and I was not sure IF I liked it. Anyway I arrived up to the lake about 10 AM and there was nobody there. The water was pretty clean but it was just too early for people to be on a picnic yet. I rode about the east end of the lake for a bit and then headed just a short way east to where the creek came into the lake. There was a bridge there and the water was high. I was tempted to jump in for a swim but decided not. On my way home I again stopped on the shores of the lake but still, at 11:00 AM now, there was nobody in sight. I rode the half mile home and decided to hit golf balls on my one hole course. That way I could see when people started to arrive at the lake as it was the main road past our farm that led to the lake. Finally about noon cars started driving past our place and I knew they were one their way to a picnic at the lake. I waited until about 12:30 and then I got my swim suit on and headed north. I had gotten a newe swim suit in the spring so I thought for sure any girls who saw me would be impressed!!! Well there is nothing worse than being alone, feeling pretty good but not knowing anybody and worse than than not having anybody notice you!! About 1:30 or so I decided there would be nobody I knew at the lake so I headed home to hit golf balls, three at a time. One for Gary, one for Arnie and one for Jack. And as you could guess Arnie always won!
As I sit here in FL with the temp near 90, an elderly man now I sometimes think back on those days. I think about youth. I think about dreams. I think about the many many years that have gone by. And yes I think about the farm. The fire. The land going to George and now there is NO reminder of what WAS. If you were to drive past where our farm WAS all you would see is a field of grain. Yes, there is still trees to the east of the road but across the creek where there was a large shelter belt is is now a small band of trees with a deer stand in it but 95% of the shelter belt is now farm land. Time has a way of forcing one to move on and look towards the future. I have done that but not without memories of times of long ago.
Well here it is 9:30. No papers today so I will have to find something else to do with my time this morning. I think I will go on a short bike ride and then maybe, just maybe, get some paper work done. Of course I will care for Terry too. A short note about Joan's Quinn. He had a brain bleed several month ago and his is still very much affected by it. He had care givers in his life but it is a slow slow process to go though. My prayers are with him that he may come out of this whole again. I might add that there are three of us in the family still living. Joan is in Utah and will turn 80 this September. I am in Florida and will be 76 come next January and Helen is in Arkansas and will be 72 this year. Time flies by but it does not allow for people to stay the same. Rather life is ever evolving and we need to welcome the change and go with the flow. Sometimes it is very difficult and sometimes it is welcome but it is ALWAYS changing. Enough for now.
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